Is it time for you to unplug??

Do you ever put your phone down?? Are you ALWAYS on the computer?? Glued to the TV?

Maybe it is time for you to unplug from electronics...

 

Not only you but your husband and kids too.

My kids have their own tablets, a tv in their bedroom, along with a ps3 in my sons room and a wii in my daughters room. My husband and I have laptops, smart phones, TV's. Don't get me wrong we are constantly "plugged in" to some type of electronics but sometimes we try to do it as a family and other times we try to unplug completely.

I'm not saying you need to unplug for DAYS! Or even hours. Maybe a 30 minute board game with your child or a 15 minute card game with your spouse, finger painting with the kids, cooking or baking as a family, or get out of the house and go somewhere for a bit.

Last summer we went on our last family beach trip before we moved from North Carolina. We went to Nags Head, NC (the outer banks). Oh my goodness it was gorgeous and just so peaceful. It is more of a family beach, where Wilmington and Myrtle Beach were more touristy and party beaches. The thing with the outer banks though was it was almost an island. So service there was little to none. My mom started to get worried because she couldn't get in touch with myself or my husband... She watches a little to much lifetime on Sundays. But for the most part we were unplugged laying on the beach the whole 4 days we were there. It was so nice not constantly texting, answering phone calls, checking emails, or being on social media. The hardest part was not being able to use the GPS on our phone. We had to use a REAL MAP! Thankfully though when I was younger we traveled a lot and used a world map so I could handle the small map of just the outer banks.

Ways we like to unplug are Family Game Night.. We pick out some games from our game stock piles sometimes we will play 4 player games where we can all play and sometimes we will pick 2 player games and Brett and I will play one game, while Brynna and Adam play another game, then we'll switch. When the kids go to bed Adam and I will play speed, California speed, blackjacks, or battleships.

We live in upstate New York now and another way we unplug is getting out and going tubing or ice skate. It's not easy being on your phone when your sledding down a hill. The thought of hitting a bump and my phone flying out of my hand and being lost forever just makes me want to leave my phone at home, in the car, or zipped up in my pocket until we leave. And while ice skating I'm too busy focusing on staying balanced to even worry about my phone. If you live near a beach you could head to the beach. No use in having your phone out and chancing a wave coming in and taking your phone out to sea.

Even though this isn't FULLY unplugged but just relaxing and watching a TV show as a family or the kids watching a kid show while mommy and daddy watch an adult show is also nice. I LOVE Christmas movies. Elf and How the Grinch Stole Christmas are 2 of my favorite Christmas Movies, but I also like all the Santa Claus movies. So normally around the holidays I record a bunch of Christmas movies and we just lay around sometimes and watch those.

So here is something I want you to try.. Unplug for 30 minutes a day. Don't even look at your phone. Then maybe on the weekends try for 1-2 hours. BTW when you unplug for 30 minutes or an hour do it all at once. Not 10 minutes here, 10 minutes there, etc. Go for a run, sit and do homework without your phone, play a board game. Their are so many options. When you were a child and didn't have electronics what did you do to have fun? Give that a try again..

What some military spouses may not know..

My husband will tell you I am a researcher. I get as much info as I can about things because I refuse to get myself into a situation that I know nothing about. Some days it drives him absolutely crazy because even though I am ALWAYS right he hates to admit it. Facebook, google, and personal blogs are great ways to get REAL opinions and recommendations. You could learn a lot about the military life or certain installations just by using the internet. Here are the few things you may not know as a military spouse but might want to know :)

PCS/Moving- ANYTIME the military moves you(pcs) you are given DLA. I have read numerous times where people didn't know they received this money when they moved and found out too late so they lost out on the $2,000+. Click here and you can also see what else you receive whenever you move(this is only for a PCS not if you move from one house to another at or near the same base). If ya'll have an upcoming PCS try and go to the levy briefing to write down everything you need to remember. Yes the husbands go but it helps if you go too, that away you aren't clueless when it comes to the move and if he forgets something maybe it will be something you remembered :)

MyCAA- Very few people know about MyCAA and it pretty much turns in to wasted money if not used. MyCAA gives you $4000 to pay for almost any type of schooling. To some $4000 might not be a lot. And truthfully when it comes to school it really isn't. BUT that is $4000 you don't have to spend on school. The only down fall to MyCAA is you have to use it by a certain time. You have to be married to an active duty service member in pay grades E1-E5, O1-O2, or W1-W2. You can use that money to get a certificate in something or you can use the $4000 to help pay for a degree. It won't cover it in full but it will help. So don't let that money go to waste, USE IT! You also need know MyCAA does not cover books so if you take a class through your local junior college you will probably have to pay out of pocket for your books.

FASFA- A lot of military families who qualify for MyCAA also qualify for FASFA and you can use MyCAA and FASFA together. FASFA WILL PAY FOR YOUR BOOKS!

METLIFE- Tricare does not cover dental work. Tricare covers your health and vision but not dental. If you plan on seeing a dentist have your spouse or even yourself enroll you and your children(if you have them) into metlife to cover your dental. ALSO Tricare only covers the eye exam. It DOES NOT cover glasses, contacts, or the contact exam. You will have to pay that out of pocket.

WIC- In the beginning surviving off what little pay ya'll get is hard paying for all the bills, gas, and groceries. And then you are left eating bread and water the last few days before payday. WIC helps military families up until a certain rank. I'm not sure if military families without children qualify but it doesn't hurt to call your local wic office and ask.

Space-A & Patriot Express-  Not many people know about this. Space-A and Patriot Express can be pretty amazing. It is a way for military members and dependents to travel and pay very little for flights. It can be a bit difficult but to pay $4-$50 per person to fly is pretty cheap! For those of yall wanting to know more about space-a click here and it will take you to the FAQ page. I'm not too familiar with it so I don't want to give the wrong information to people, their are many requirements to travel space-a.

ICE- If you only remember one thing from this blog post PLEASE remember ICE! ICE is a GREAT tool for service members and dependents to use and it can be done anonymously if you'd like. Now don't abuse this tool. It is a website where DoD customers can rate their services provided. I will personally say I have used this a LOT in the past year. A LOT more than I wanted to. But every single time it was necessary. Don't file a complaint just because your husband was smoked for showing up 30 minutes late. Or because he is having to work late all week. Their is a time and place for an ICE complaint. You can't expect someone to fix something they know nothing about and that's where ICE comes in place. Not only can you make complaints on the ICE website but you can also provide positive feedback. My son was bit by a dog and the doctor we saw off post at the hospital also worked on post and followed up with us twice about the dog bite. He did great with my son so we provided positive feedback on ICE about him. It is a great tool for all to use.

CYS- Child and Youth Services is on every military installation where dependents are allowed. It is where you enroll your kids in sports, child care, and many other things. If your spouse is deploying CYS gives you a little more benefits. Here at Fort Drum we get:
- 16 hours free care per month/per child at Hourly Programming.
- $2.00 per hour after 16 hrs of free monthly hourly care
- Free Care for deployment briefings
- Free Care for FRG meetings            
(including one month prior and 3 months after  deployment)
- 20% fee discount for Full Day and Part Day care with a working spouse  
- $300 SKIES Credit (instructional) per Dep.  
- $100 CYSS Sports Credit per Dep.
But your child does have to be enrolled in CYS before you qualify for all this. And all you need is an updated physical, shot records, and certain records. You can call CYS to schedule an appointment and see what all you need to bring.

DISCOUNTS- here is a discount list. Those probably are not all of the discounts you and your spouse can receive with a military ID. Any time we make a big purchase or set up service with someone we make sure to ask about a military discount. We don't ask for it whenever we pay for dinner and if they give it we just add the discount they gave us on to our tip we give. But like we bought furniture a few months back and that was a BIG purchase but we got a small discount that makes it not SO BIG! haha. Our phone, tv, and internet service we have a discount. If you buy a car at the end ask if they do a military discount. Don't ask up front because they will probably act like they gave a military discount but jack up another fee to make it even out. During certain military holidays a lot of the stores near military bases will do sales and then if you show your military id you will get even more of a discount! Last year Kirklands had a HUGE sale. I think it was the weekend of veterans day and if you had your military id you got the extra 10% off. Well I had been eyeing this huge painting that I just loved but it was over $100 and I am cheap when it comes to buying décor.. That weekend I managed to get the painting for $30-$40!!

Military OneSourse- The military life does have it's difficulties. Your spouse could be suffering from PTSD and you may think you have no where to turn but Military OneSourse is confidential and offers a lot of help. You or your children could also be having problems coping with the recent deployment. Give Military OneSourse a call. Don't knock it until you've tried it. Maybe you are new to the military and are clueless when it comes to budgeting. Call Military OneSourse. Their is help out there and all you have to do is make the call.

The military does have a LOT more to offer military spouses these are just some of the things I have seen that most people don't know about.

(you can click on every bold blue word and it will take you to their website to get more information)

Oxygen....

Most little girls always dream about their future. I still remember laying in my bed talking to my best friends about how many kids I wanted to have, what their names were going to be, who I was going to marry, what I wanted to be whenever I grew up, and so much more. I had it all planned out. I wanted to be a doctor (I later changed my mind to nurse and honestly I’m still not sure if I want to be a nurse). After I got my career I wanted to get married and have a big family, 3 or 4 children. I always said 4 because I hate odd numbers haha. But for now the 2 I have make me feel like I have 4(plus my husband who at times makes me feel like I have 2 more kids haha). At that age you never think about the changing poopie diapers 5+ times a day, paying for daycare, teaching a toddler how to pee on the potty, budgeting, bills, and so much more.

Things don’t always go according to plan though. My junior year I found out I was pregnant. And my world turned upside down. I was terrified. I was still a child, and I was bringing a child into this world. My life as I knew it was over. BUT it was not the end of the world. I had a choice to make either have the child and grow up, or become another statistic.. I AM a teen mom (I can’t say was because once you are a teen mom you are always a teen mom). I had 2 children by the time I was 20. They are MY WORLD! They are everything to me. But sometimes I wonder am I a good mom? Will my children grow up and look back and say they had a great child hood? Great parents? I know I can look back and say I had an amazing childhood and I want my children to be able to say the same.

The other night as Adam and I were watching Moms' Night Out. It really was a great movie. I expected it to be more of a comical movie and it was very funny but it is also an eye opener. Within minutes I could relate to the main character. She was a stay at home mom with a working husband who is gone a lot. She didn’t have much alone time and getting dressed up and going out is a RARE occasion. She kind of lost herself while being a mother. Most moms can relate to that, you always put your children and your family first. During the movie the husband, who travels by plane a lot makes a comment to his wife about how, "You must put your oxygen mask on first, in order to be of any help to anyone else.” You really have to take care of yourself before you can take care of others. You have to be happy for your family and children to be happy. “You need your oxygen.”

 

This past weekend news got out that a house burned down here at Fort Drum. It was a family of 5 with 2 dogs and they had just recently moved here. EVERYONE was quick to help, donating food for the animals, clothes, supplies, and so much more. It’s amazing how the military really is one big family. Even if you don’t know someone they are more than likely going through something you have already gone through or will go through. Well, a few days later news got out that the mother was arrested for starting the fire that burned down her house. Those same people that were originally wanting to help the mother were judging her. I won’t lie I was one of those people, but then you start to think about it. She is a mother to 3 small children, married to the army, just recently moved, and probably has NO ONE. The military has help. But from my experience they are quick to say no. Adam and I are STILL dealing with a very stressful, unorganized, crazy pcs. And if it wasn’t for my mom and grandma we would probably be living in our car right now. All I can think about is maybe they dealt with the same thing. She needed help and she probably had no one to turn to. Being a military wife is extremely hard at time. Being a mom is also extremely hard at times. Being married can also be hard. Now put all those things together and maybe one bad thing after another and you just hit a breaking point. In this

My very best friend in this crazy military
life. I miss her so much! One day we will be
together again :)

type of life you need a friend. At least one true friend…. Besides your husband. Yes your husband is a great person to talk to but you also need a person to keep you sane. Whether it be having a drink with her, getting your nails done, going out to eat, or maybe just keeping your kids while you run an errand. You may have amazing friends back home or at your previous duty station but you can’t let that hold you back whenever you move somewhere else. You don’t have to lose your previous friends you just have to make more friends. This woman burned down her house. I highly doubt she wanted to do it. I honestly think it was a complete accident. I don’t think she ever had the intention of burning down her children’s home but it happened. And now for the rest of her life she will have to live with it.

Another quotes from Moms' Night Out.
“Ya’ll spend so much time beating yourselves up.  I doubt the good Lord made a mistake giving your kiddos the mom he did.” –Bones